Sparks! with April Beyer

You are closer than you think.

Dating Advice

A FRESH START

Whether you’ve been single for what seems like eternity, dating random people that you have no connection with, or in the wrong relationship for too long, now is the time to make some updates and changes to your dating life. The time is NOW. No more waiting around and simply hoping things will get better. Your circumstances won’t improve just by wishing them to. Snow White was a cute story for when we were girls, but singing the tune, “I’m wishing” into a wishing well just won’t cut it. You’re in charge of your life. Be in your most powerful feminine space. This means, be soulful, listen and open your eyes, heart and ears! It’s your story. Start writing it!

Here are my 5 top tips to kick start your new relationship year.

  1. Get rid of your Lists:  They’re holding you back and keeping you in an intellectual look at your love life. Life happens when you’re busy making plans. Be flexible and open to new thoughts, ideas, places and people. It’s the only way to stay youthful and fresh. The only items that should remain on your lists are your top 3 most needed traits in someone. Notice how I used the word NEEDED and not WANTED.
  2. Ask yourself this Question“How do I want to feel when I am with someone?” This is a question I ask of all of my clients. It’s a simple and effective way to keep you on track for what and who you’re looking for. Forget about whether or not he or she fits the picture. Find out what your heart, mind and body are telling you about this person.
  3. Trust your Instincts:  Start developing a better sense of yourself and start trusting what your gut tells you! No more excuses as to why someone is not calling or treating you very well. Remember, people tend show themselves RIGHT away! This is not the time for 2nd and 3rd chances! A good guy is a good guy from start to finish. A woman will show interest in you from the get go for all you guys out there. Stop thinking so much and trying to rationalize everyone else’s actions.  Keep moving if someone new in your life isn’t treating you with care and respect. If you’re waiting around for things to get better, you’re only encouraging bad behavior. No man has ever fallen for a woman that he could walk all over. Same for women, as a man, you have to show her that you respect yourself. Confidence is sexy.
  4. Forgive:  This means forgive the people from your past. Parents, siblings, co workers, friends, past relationships…anyone who has caused you pain and grief: let it go! It will never serve you to hold on to old feelings that are weighing you down. Remember, it’s a new year and a time for renewal. Forgiveness also means to forgive yourself. No one is perfect and life is about learning and growing. Don’t make the fatal mistake of talking about your ex’s on your dates. Even if you are asked! Yesterday does NOT equal today. Just because you made some lousy choices in partners last year, doesn’t mean this year will be the same.
  5. Sharpen your Image:  Every business needs a branding and marketing strategy and when things get old and dated, you need to revamp and move with the ever changing times. If you feel that last year was not your best, it’s important to take a step back and take a good, long look at yourself. What are you presenting to the opposite sex? Do you see yourself as others do? If you gained some weight during the year from bad habits, then find a way to lose it. Again, this is about how YOU feel. If you don’t love the way you look and feel, trust me, no one else will either. Especially a stranger.

Are you attracting people or pushing them away? Are you the girl that never gets the 1st date let alone the 2nd? There are probably things that you are doing, saying or even expressing unconsciously that are sending all the wrong signals.

A lot of what I do in my private coaching sessions is taking all of these questions and creating answers which lead my clients to a place of specificity. I speak from experience when I tell you that everything I have attracted in my life is because I am confident, clear and know exactly who I am and what I want out of my life.

In short, it’s time to update everything.  Your look, your outlook on life, your idea of yourself and your idea of the person you think you should meet.

Thank you for reading my article. If you enjoyed it…PLEASE Like, Tweet or even Share it with a friend! I’d also love to hear your comments or questions below…

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