Sparks! with April Beyer

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Can an App Erase the Pain?

Who among us hasn’t suffered a breakup so devastating that we’ve, at least momentarily, wished we could turn back time and spare ourselves the pain of ever having fallen in the first place. Remember Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind (if you haven’t seen this film, you must!)? How about TV’s fairy-tale saga Once Upon a Time, when Snow White takes the amnesia potion to forget Prince Charming?

It’s a sentiment to which we can all relate: if only there were some magic pill or procedure to make us forget, or better yet, an app that would wipe away the past. Turns out there is — sort of.

Last week (on Valentine’s Day!), Android unveiled an app called “Killswitch” that deletes all traces of your ex on Facebook, saving the once-again single the anguish of revisiting the virtual remnants of their former love-lives.

While I understand the desire to push through pain as quickly as possible (and I do see the appeal of this app), I’d hate to see people try to adopt such a flippant approach to their emotions, when getting over an ex. People are not disposable; it’s supposed to be hard, and contrary to how it feels, failed relationships can teach us immensely valuable lessons that will help steer us on the path to love.

The key here is to cultivate a perspective that combines wisdom and gratitude when it comes to your past relationships, and (this is very important!) to be gentle with your heart. As unlikely as it might feel when you’re in the thick of it, I’m certain that you learned important things about yourself during your time with your last partner. Maybe you learned about your communication style, maybe you learned how to be more trusting, or maybe you learned what you absolutely don’t want in future a relationship. All of these are valuable!

I suggest you take a moment to reflect and, without judgment, explore some of the things you discovered about you. Being mindful of your journey will not only help you heal, but will also help you move forward in a more authentic way and ultimately lead you toward a more fulfilling relationship. And there is no app for that!

Your friend in love,
April Beyer Signature

P.S. Thank goodness there are apps for the busy! I’ve got so much excitement and life-changing information in the works for participants of my Smart Sexy Soulful Dating™ course, which teaches you everything you need to know to find the guy that’s perfect for you! Hope you’re planning to join me. Remember to sign up to be notified when early registration opens!

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